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2023. What a wonderful year. My buddy Rick AD who produces Washington area parties of the adult variety, including the decadent DC Fetish Ball, is celebrating its 15th event, and this September I'm celebrating my 15 years as a pro domme. What better way to officially celebrate than at the ball with a special offer for subs! Come see me on stage for the Pro Domme Walk or enjoy an opportunity for public play with me in the dungeon while supporting a great cause! Tickets, info, and dress code: DCFetishBall.com Date: October 8, 2023 Time: 9 PM - 2 AM Where: Ultra Bar, 911 F Street NW, Washington DC 20004 This event sells out every year. Don't snooze! Wanna play? For every $100 donation you make to HIPS DC, I'll use you as my plaything in the dungeon for 15 minutes of play. For many of you who have fantasized about being used by me and it hasn't been in your budget, here's your big chance! Want to be put over my lap and spanked? Flogged and whipped? Be my human footstool? Be paraded around on a leash? Be my spittoon? Suck the filth off my heels? All while dozens of people are watching at any given time? This is the opportunity of a lifetime! Once the fashion show and Pro Domme Walk are over, we can go to the dungeon to make your exhibitionist fantasy happen! How: 1). Donate to HIPS. $100 for 15 minutes, $200 for 30, $300 for 45, or $400 for an hour. 2). Text me your receipt. (No, I don't give my personal number out. Could you imagine the volume of crazies I'd get harassing me?) 3). I'll tell you exactly where to meet me at the ball. Not sure your scene can be done at DC Fetish Ball? Their website gives you a good idea of what's allowed and what's not, but you can always text me and ask. The club does NOT permit nudity. Want to meet for dinner before the ball or be my slave for the duration? Packages start at $2000 for 5 hours (a portion will be donated to HIPS DC). Text me first to see if we're a match! Can't make it to the ball but still want to express appreciation? Send me a gift via SpoilLydia.com but I do hope to see you there! Next year mark your calendars and stay tuned for the special plans I'll have in place for my Sweet 16 Dommiversary!

May 13 will be 4 years since opening my dungeon here in DC, and I couldn't be more excited to celebrate! Despite moving here with undiagnosed Lyme disease and dealing with the intense fatigue, I managed to get the main playroom play-able in 13 days while making my own place livable as well. (Luckily the Boiler Room came to me "pre-decorated" and luckily I eventually recovered from Lyme!) Then in March 2020, COVID brought a lot of uncertainty and I saw other dungeons close down. It crushed me having to put renovations for the rest of the space on hold for so long. But here I am in 2023 with the hallway completed (an ode to my old dungeon in Philly) thanks to Sissy Tess's hard work of ripping up tiles, sanding down "tar", and painting the concrete. And the much-awaited feminization room will have its unveiling very, very soon. After it's done, I'm going to need a financial break before I complete the medical room. "Did she say, 'medical room'??"👀 (Yes, yes she did.) To celebrate my 4 years, all Beginner, Power Exchange, and Fetish Play sessions between May 11 - 18 that are 3 hours or more will be $100 off! Mention this offer when you book. Does not apply to session requests outside of the dungeon. To express gratitude for the play space I provide, be a good boy or good girl and ThankLydia.com to send a gift for my dungeon or for my personal enjoyment. My first session on opening day (before I knew I wanted red walls). My movers couldn't fit my bondage table through the door so until it could be carefully taken apart and reassembled, I'm glad I had this in the meantime! I painted and sealed the floors then ultimately changed my mind on that too. My throne on the moving truck! The bondage table that had to be disassembled and reassembled. Can you believe this is the same room? What a difference wall paint and new floors make! By the way, if you want to paint your walls red, this took me 5 coats so expect a very sore arm. The original boiler room. I need an updated photo with the new sexy rubber swing and new floors! I made sure the inside of the cage was comfortable so when you spend the night in it, you don't wake up with a sore back and can still serve me. Just ask Sissy Jessica. Hallway before. Can you believe these were the walls and floors I had to deal with?? Hallway after. Fun fact: Being Hindu, I had a most fitting muhurta chosen for my opening day. A muhurta is a Hindu measurement of time. The belief is that when starting something new certain days and times will yield more success. Muhurtas are chosen for wedding dates, new construction, opening day for a business, and more. When you want something to succeed, you take all the luck you can get! I'm close with the Pandit (priest) I consulted with; he knows exactly what type of business I do. He suggested a muhurta that was good for (I kid you not): "bondage (ensnaring) and other cruel deeds, waging war... wearing ornaments". He joked, "Right up your alley!" Knowing that I also adore crossdressers, regarding the part about "wearing ornaments", he commented, "it fits your niche for dressing up your clients." What I didn't tell him is that I also love waging war... with my strapon. But maybe that's for another conversation.😉

Many subs or the sub-curious contact me on SextPanther to discuss their fantasies and desire to book a session. It's very common that it's followed by, "I want to book a session so badly, but I'm scared!" This is the very reason why pro dommes have deposits in place, particularly for first timers. Fear makes otherwise dependable people turn into flakes. Fear can also suck out the fun from living as our true authentic selves. Not to mention, if you are so overcome with fear that it affects your ability to follow through, the idea of a session with you doesn't sound like a fun time anymore. There is no one answer or quick fix, but the common fears preventing subs from moving forward in realizing their fantasies revolve around the fear of the unknown. Sometimes knowing the cause of our fears and viewing the fear through a different lens helps us work through them and attain the human happiness we all crave and deserve. Let's take a look at some of the causes. While some of this is aimed at submissive men, if you are female, trans or non-binary, you may find yourself with these very same concerns. Fear 1: "What if the Mistress does something that makes me feel really uncomfortable, pushes me to do something I'll regret, or she hurts me really badly?" This is a fear for a reason. I've heard all kinds of horror stories! This is why it's important to think with the head on your shoulders and not in between your legs when researching a Mistress. Read her website and social media to see her experience level is, what her style is like, and if her style is compatible with what you're looking to experience. Or arrange for a consultation session either via text, phone, video call, or in person to get to know her better before you commit. It's important to negotiate limits. There's also no shame in starting off light. It's always better to crave more for next time than excitedly agree to more than you can handle just because you were horny. If you're not sure of what you can or can't handle, consider my "Beginner BDSM Sampler Platter" where I act as more of a friendly kinky guide than a slave training Mistress slowly seducing away your power. ​ Fear 2: "What if I like it? Then what?? How will it affect my dating relationships in the future or my current relationship?" ​If you are indeed submissive, then you should know that about yourself and give your submissive self the attention it deserves. You may find you don't need BDSM play as much as you thought but if you find that you do, celebrate that newfound knowledge! And if you find that you do need it on a very regular basis and desire it within the context of a romantic partnership, just as you take inventory of yourself and what you have to offer a potential partner, you will now know what to factor into your list of requirements that you seek in a relationship. If you are currently partnered, wouldn't you agree that it's still worth finally finding out if this is indeed a part of your identity? Then finding a healthy way to nurture your submissiveness? You'd be surprised how many wives have had an open mind and discovered a new dominant side of themselves, or, decided to give dominating their husbands a try, realized it's not for them, then flat out told their hubbies to book a session with a pro domme. Then there are some subs who prefer to keep it as a secret for themselves. That is something you will have to decide on your own as I can't tell you what's right or wrong for you. Fear 3: "Will a Mistress actually be into playing with me? Will I disappoint her??" Mother Nature instilled ego in man for a reason. Of course, there's the untrained negative end of the male ego spectrum which manifests through thoughtless, self-centered, and uncompromising behaviors. However, on the positive end is the natural desire to please paired with the need to know that you did a job well done. If you did your research and found a compatible Mistress, as long as you are polite, thoughtful, and follow her commands to the best of your ability, no doubt she will be very pleased with you. She may express that by bragging about you on Twitter, or if she's more low-key (or not a social media person), her satisfaction will be expressed with a smile, giving you a "good boy" (or girl), a reward, or simply allowing you to see her in the future. And when your efforts are appreciated, remember that it's not to feed your ego, but to appreciate and encourage you. Don't let it go to your head. ;-) Fear 4: "What if I like it so much that I want to do it all the time??" Usually what happens is that a first timer will be so thrilled that they finally gave BDSM a try and can finally start to embrace themselves. Then they can figure out a healthy balance of how often they should session. For some who had years or even decades of repressed submissive feelings, they had to go on a mini splurge to balance themselves out. Imagine being in a country that didn't have your favorite dessert, then coming back home after ten years. You'd probably run straight to the bakery and pig out for a week or two, then your pastry starved self would be satisfied, and the cravings will calm down. In the same way, the desire to submit does eventually calm down to less frequency, and you'll find your balance of how often you should session. Some subs find their balance is a once-a-year birthday gift of self-care. Others quarterly or monthly, or even more if their finances and schedules allow. I find it's better to set a realistic schedule (and what works with your budget) rather than try to go too long and deny yourself. How often have we seen dieters try to cut out all sugar or carbs forever? They end up failing and developing unhealthy relationships with food. I don't subscribe to the idea of submission (or dominance for that matter) being "naughty", "a treat", "indulgent", or any other negative word. Your submissiveness should be embraced and nurtured in a safe space with someone whom you can trust and accepts who you are. That way you can dive right into submission without any fears.