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Who is Ms. Lydia?

Lucky for me that I get to be a lot of things to a lot of people.

A Mistress. Slave trainer. Mentor. Disciplinarian. 

A Tease. Step-mommy. Boss. Sadist.


A kinky dominant friend. Model. Performer. Life and kink coach. A compassionate counselor and guide.


A Creator of your new identity. Someone with whom you can feel at ease being your true submissive self with.

A born lifestyle Dominant. No scripts. No theater. Just an authentic femdom experience. My first memories of dominating boys stem back to being a grade school bully: tormenting the school nerd and hitting boys when I didn’t get my way. Later in middle school, at age 12, I put makeup on a 17-year-old boy and with my girlfriends cheering on, forced him to "act like a girl". In high school I further explored the psychological aspects of domination with my best friend, a handsome gifted literal genius, talented musician and star athlete. I lured my test subject into mental games of humiliation, control and servitude. This dynamic lasted from ages 15 until 19 and set the bar for how I am to be treated by males: I am to be served and worshiped with grace and humility by worthy submissive gentlemen. When I reached 21, I had a serious boyfriend, yet I still had a young 18 year old senior in high school who had a crush on me and I used that knowledge to my advantage. He often found himself in erotically humiliating situations in both private and public.

I still didn't understand why I sought out intelligent and driven yet "bitch boy" types as friends. I set those feelings aside out of confusion. I struggled between wanting to be normal yet wanting to be adored and obeyed and to punish boys who didn't comply. I thought my feelings lay dormant and at 23, I further closeted myself and dove into a seemingly happy vanilla marriage with my boyfriend of 3-1/2 years. As a young bride with no outlet for my dominant urges I was left unfulfilled. Each time my desires would bubble up, I'd push them back down with only temporary relief leaving me feeling exhausted from living a lie. I wanted to control his orgasms, command him in the bedroom, punish him when he was bad, have him serve me with massages and house cleaning and most importantly, I wanted to let all of our friends know that he was Mr. Lydia. However, unable to use him to satisfy my needs, I turned the other way and used him as my cover to prove to the world (and futilely to myself) that I was "normal".

Then in 2006 life took a turn… I was living in Philadelphia and a fashion designer friend was short on models for a fashion show in Manhattan. As a favor, I strutted down a runway at a fetish ball in a tightly laced corset and 6" heels which I found wearing to be absolutely titillating! By the end of the evening, I made a few pervy friends which led to more fetish fashion shows, more parties and more perverts in my life. My new association validated my repressed urges, and I slowly began embracing who I was. This shift took me on a journey of deeper self-exploration. Since then, I've devoured kinky educational texts, taken numerous classes in multiple areas of the BDSM arts, immersed myself in the public BDSM scenes in both NYC and Philadelphia as well as attending fetish events and Manhattan play parties. I was later further mentored under some of the finest professional dominas in the Northeast who helped shape the confidant alpha female I am today. Leaving behind my confining marriage and eventually leaving behind my successful career, I am now comfortable in my own skin and fully embrace who I am: a dominant and depraved collector of submissive men.

With selective part-time intentions, I began taking professional sessions in September 2008 just to fund my latex and high heel addiction. Eventually my hobby evolved into a full-time passion in November 2011. In 2017 I left behind my 2,300 square foot loft dungeon in Center City Philadelphia. After a brief stay in Texas (what a mistake, there's Texans in Texas!), as of May 2019 I now based in Washington DC. Many of my longtime fans may not know this, but before I moved to Philadelphia, I was living in Maryland. It's so nice to be back in the area! You can find me regularly training slaves in Philadelphia, New York, Richmond. You can also sometimes find me in North Carolina and Chicago (sporadically) and I make it to Los Angeles about once a year.

I've starred in numerous femdom and fetish videos for both American and British websites such as Club Dom, Femdom Empire, Nikki Whiplash's websites and The English Mansion. I have also been selected as a resident Priestess of The Order of Indomitus, a Female Supremacy weekend event held in Southern Florida, as well the Goddess Worship event, EDEN.

When not training slaves, I can be found at the gym or yoga studio, meditating, doing volunteer work, studying Sanskrit, reading about nutrition, Ayurveda, philosophy, and matriarchal societies. I also enjoy cooking healthy vegetarian meals, traveling to see my favorite bands and venting steam on dance floors around the country.

At a glance...
Height: 5'7" (stockings) 6'1" (heels)
Bust: 41", 36DD bra

Waist: 29"

Hips: 42"
Shoe size: 9 - 9.5 US / 40 EU / 7 UK / 25.5 JP
Eyes: Hazel
Hair: Black (extends to the small of my back)
Ethnicities: 3/4 Asian mix (Filipina and Chinese) and 1/4 Caucasian (English, Irish & German)
Hometown: Honolulu, Hawaii



Book: The Mahabharata

Colors: Black, red, white, yellow, jewel tones, gold and silver.

Drink: Ginger tea and smoothies.

Flowers: Potted- Orchids (white, reds, pinks, yellow); Bouquets/Arrangements- Anything pink!

Restaurants: Fancy Radish (DC), Vedge (Philadelphia), Hangawai (Manhattan), Hakkasan (Manhattan), Liora (Baltimore). !

Gifts: Visit for current wish list and favorite gift cards

Curious about learning more about me? Text or call me anonymously via

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